I was looking for a picture of Brontosaurus recently (some days you need Brontosaurus) and I made a horrifying discovery: according to random-guy-on-the-web, Brontosaurus hasn’t been a separate genus of dinosaur for over a hundred years.
You heard me. Brontosaurus as we know him does not exist.
According to my scientific study—asking myself, which dinosaurs can I think of?—Brontosaurus is one of the three dinosaurs everyone knows. The others, of course, being Tyrannosaurus rex and Velociraptor. Thanks, Jurassic Park.
So I’m sure you can understand why I doubted that random-guy knew what he was talking about.
I went to the source of all wisdom, Wikipedia. (Don’t ask me for the link. You know where it is.)
Wikipedia concurs. Brontosaurus was discovered in 1879 and in 1903 Elmer Riggs in the Geological Series of the Field Columbian Museum argued that Brontosaurus was really just a small Apatosaurus. Riggs was writing the book, so I suppose his argument held some weight.
Scientists spent the next few decades piecing together dinosaur bones into Frankensaurs and disagreeing about what they’d made. Some of the pieces probably were from Brontosaurus, but that’s beside the point.
Brontosaurus must have been devastated.
What’s more, I can only imagine how bad a case of impostor syndrome he developed. For over a hundred years, children drew pictures of big stupid beasts eating leaves and called them Brontosaurus, while Brontosaurus stood in the corner and thought, “I’m a fraud. What’ll happen when they discover I’m not real? I should tell them, but I can’t tell them because I like people thinking I’m real.”
After over a hundred years of blushing and hiding his face, Brontosaurus is back. Scientists in 2015 did sciency stuff that shows that oops, they were right in 1879 and Brontosaurus is real after all.
Yay for Brontosaurus! He can finally show his face again.
Experts expect him to be reclassified by 2020. In the meantime, in expectation of his re-emergence, I’ve made Brontosaurus more kick-ass.
Did anyone else know about Brontosaurus’ secret shame? What else do I think is real that isn’t?
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